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Expatriarch

by Bijou Noir

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1.
And the truth is While you were talking about the weather I was thinking about god The city's not always this cold God is not always so far You can not start a revolution You can not start a revolution The thing about it While you were complaining about the government I was thinking about my old man He gave me everything he had But somehow he was so far away He did not start a revolution He did not start a revolution You can not start a revolution (You can not start a revolution) You can not start a revolution And I have never ever ever been so ignorant in my life And I have never ever ever felt so sure about anything And I have never ever ever been so ignorant in my life And I have never ever ever felt so sure So sure Here’s how it goes I am not talking about money I am speaking about the chance I know that I had more of both but We all want more than we have I can not start a revolution I can not start a revolution You can not start a revolution (You can not start a revolution) You can not start a revolution (You can not start a revolution) You can not start a revolution With a thing in your hand It’s gonna take a raised fist, man
2.
I turned into a river And cut right through the hill That I was prepared To die on I muddied your good ground Right beneath your feet I was not formed For you to rely on You don’t get to drag me down with you You don’t get to put me through Everything you think you do What to do escapes you but That does not make you free You’re a lot of things to me Why make me your enemy? Why make me your enemy? You folded and reshuffled Just to play the same damn game You better gamble to win When you deal the devil in Cause you don’t make better odds Just by pushing in more chips And ignoring your debts Ain’t gonna settle them, no You don’t get to drag me down with you You don’t get to put me through Everything you think you do What to do escapes you but That does not make you free You’re a lot of things to me Don’t make me your enemy Don’t make me your enemy Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? And when my stillness shattered I would no longer reflect Your terrible beauty And flickering pain So when we parted ways It was like Moses parting water And then you cried for relief And waited for rain You can’t float your troubles down my back I won’t wash away your shame Or carry to you what you lack You can’t float your troubles down my back I won’t wash away your shame Or carry to you what you lack Or carry to you what you lack Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy? Don’t make me your enemy Why make me your enemy?
3.
Black coffee, straight whiskey, and unfiltered cigarettes I've got my ways to speed the days up And pry my mind away from The grips of regret But baby's got a mind of her own Everybody's got their own way of losing control I got a steadier hand Since I cut back on the wine My heart’s still black as the sea Something is twisted inside I do not trust my own mind No longer love the tricks it plays on me Mmm The first one is to take the edge off The second's cause the first tastes so good The third one, that’s for fun Why take the edge off now? Take my whole head off, oh Baby's got a mind of her own Everybody's got their own way of losing control I got a steadier hand Since I cut back on the wine My heart’s still black as the sea Something is twisted inside I do not trust my own mind No longer love the tricks it plays on me Mmm Baby's got a mind of her own (Baby’s got a mind of her own) Ah, baby's got a mind of her own I got a steadier hand I cut back on the wine My heart is black My heart’s still black Something is twisted inside I do not trust my own mind No longer love the tricks it plays on I no longer Have a steadier hand Since I cut back on the wine My heart’s still black as the sea Something is twisted inside I do not trust my own mind No longer love the tricks it plays me Yeah I got a steadier hand Since I cut back on the wine My heart’s still black as the sea Something is twisted inside I do not trust my own mind No longer love the tricks it plays me Mmm
4.
Well I admit to it all I know I acted like I was ten feet tall I know that but for the wrath of god Go us all I dreamed of this life Both sides of my eyes Then I learned the truth This dream has a price Maybe we'll break Or bend all the rules There's so little difference Between masters and fools And we're barely not each other After all Well I admit to it all I know I acted like I was ten feet tall I know that but for the wrath of god Go us all I know I’m small Now I’m on my way And I cut a wide path I needed somewhere to go So I could turn back And she said, "What'll you have?" I said, "I don't think I should Just because it goes down easy Doesn't mean it's good” And we're barely not each other After all Well I admit to it all I know I acted like I was ten feet tall I know that but for the wrath of god Go us all I know I’m small I admit to it all I tried to run before I learned how to crawl I know I acted like I was ten feet tall I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small And I admit to it all, yeah I admit to it all I admit to it all I tried to run before I learned how to crawl I know that but for the wrath of god Go us all I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small I know I’m small Well I admit to it all
5.
La la la la la La la la la la la la La la la la la La la la la la la la The city sets the pace The city sets the pace And I put my pencil to the drive line And take my place I know I’ve made mistakes I know I’ve made mistakes And I made the biggest one by Shedding my red blood for this place Cause there’s too much noise in this town And there are too many ways to drag a man down I only thought I could help you Cause I thought I’d stick around But there’s just too much noise in this town La la la la la La la la la la la la La la la la la La la la la la la la To everyone who's seen me around town I told more lies with my eyes than with my mouth I tried to hear you out I tried to hear you out But every time you reassure me It leaves me more doubt Cause there’s too much noise in this town And there are too many ways to drag a man down I only thought I could help you Cause I thought I’d stick around But there’s just too much noise in this town La la la la la La la la la la la la La la la la la La la la la la la la La la la La la la La la la La la la La la la La la la la la Cause there’s too much noise in this town And there are too many ways to drag a man down They only ever want you when you’re not around But there’s just too much noise in this town The city sets the pace The city sets the pace The city sets the pace And I know my place
6.
One lucid thought Crashed into my mind Something I'd avoided for a long time I don't think you see me as I am There were no boundaries We had distance A line of sight along the lines of least resistance But I don't think you see me as I am Well I've got something to say But it gets in the way of my outsized pride Whenever I try They collide And you’ve got lies on your lips But there’s truth in the tips of Your outstretched fingers Whenever I’m near So I hear But I don't think you see me as I am Well I've got something to say But it gets in the way of my outsized pride Whenever I try They collide And you’ve got lies on your lips But there’s truth in the tips of Your outstretched fingers Whenever I’m near So I hear So now permit me to me to grip What I used to let slip And I don't miss much So we'll stay in touch If you must But let's dispense with the myth That we live to exist Like a bone and surgeon There's nothing to mend No wounds to attend Well I've got something to say But it gets in the way of my outsized pride Whenever I try They collide And you’ve got lies on your lips But there’s truth in the tips of Your outstretched fingers Whenever I’m near So I hear I don't think you see me as I am
7.
I used to think to be all by myself would make me stronger But all that running around it only wore me down So when it came time to get mine and take flight I was unsound I could reach no height and I ran aground I ran aground The complicated question of where you're from Depends on where we are when you ask Doesn't really matter where I'm from Every time I lift off I land I used to think to be all by myself would make me stronger But all that running around it only wore me down So when it came time to get mine and take flight I was unsound I could reach no height and I ran aground I ran aground I am from a long line of lonely men With deep set eyes and secretive hearts Far too familiar with abandonment Nothing special, set completely apart I used to think to be all by myself would make me stronger But all that running around it only wore me down So when it came time to get mine and take flight I was unsound I could reach no height and I I ran aground Oh, to the ground I could reach no height and I I ran aground Straight to the ground The stony ground I could reach no height and I I can only see you in stark relief All the details obscured I never seen what your mama seen and I Ain’t heard the voices you heard I used to think to be all by myself would make me stronger But all that running around it only wore me down (It wore me down) So when it came time to get mine and take flight I was unsound I could reach no height and I I used to think I could reach those heights but I ran aground I used to think I could I used to think that I could I used to think I could reach those heights but I ran aground I used to think I could But I ran aground I ran aground Straight to the ground now I could reach no height and I I ran aground Straight to the ground The stony ground I could reach no height and I I ran aground
8.
We were once strangers Isn’t that strange? I guess it worked out I guess something worked out for a change I woke up like this With the bones and the guts of our love Wrapped around me And this loneliness That I nursed like a wound, and I dressed like a fist of a fighter Passed like a storm I was a cynic Playing a saint You were the first time You were the first time my dry roots had tasted rain I woke up like this With the bones and the guts of our love Wrapped around me And this loneliness That I nursed like a wound, and I dressed like a fist of a fighter Passed like a storm I woke up like this With the bones and the guts of our love Wrapped around me And this loneliness That I nursed like a wound, and I dressed like a fist of a fighter Passed like a storm I woke up like this

credits

released October 1, 2021

bijounoir.co / givetake.life

Lyrics, vocals, music, electric ukulele by Augustus Watkins
Mixed by Garrett Neal
Mastered by Oli Morgan at Abbey Road Studios
Photo by Cait Greeley
Strings by Ray Minge
Trumpet by Maelea Millis

Design & layout by J. Lexvold.

A GIVE/TAKE release. GT025 © 2021 Bijou Noir. ℗ 2021 Fraternal Order of Warlocks (ASCAP). All rights reserved. Unauthorized duplication is a violation of applicable laws.

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Bijou Noir Los Angeles, California

Alt-pop singer-songwriter.

Moody electro productions, big choruses.

Bijou Noir is a genre-defying mix of intelligent pop, post-punk, new wave, electronic, and indie rock, with a strong lyrical center.
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